"The Lonely Polygamist" by Barry Udall

Sometimes a man wants to come to home from a hard day's work to a little peace and quiet. I imagine. Golden Richards does not have that luxury, ever. With three households, four wives and a large number of children, peace is a highly rated commodity last seen three marriages and a large number of children ago. Mayhem, chaos, screaming and living room races are the order of the day, yet in the midst of all of this life, Golden Richards is a lonely man. A lonely polygamist. 

If you have read "The 19th Wife" by David Ebershoff or "The Chosen One" by Carol Lynch Williams you might have a pretty bad perception of polygamists and mormons. And polygamist mormons. If you want a different take on things, you need to read "The Lonely Polygamist" by Barry Udall where the focus is not on the children of polygamist families as in the two other books but on the husband, the one who is often blamed as the bad guy. 

There is nothing bad about Golden. Nothing at all. He is a good, lovely, loveable man but he is also completely incompetent when it comes to decision-making. As the captain of the family, he is useless. Thankfully he has four wives to lean one, although they all wish that he would lean a little less and lead a little more... But seeing as he doesn't, they run the family, deciding how, what, when and where at the weekly Summit of the Wives. If it wasn't for the fact that it is Golden's construction company that brings in the money to fund food and soon to be hand-me-down clothes for the many children, they would do just fine without him. And most of the time they have to because Golden's business means that he has to drive far to work on projects - to their knowledge, he is building a care home for the elderly in the Nevada desert. In reality he is building a brothel. And this is just one of the many worries, that Golden struggles with and that make him so terribly lonely. 

Golden has a constant feeling that he is not doing well enough. He is struggling to finance the lifestyle with the three households and the many many children, he is struggling to live up to the expectations from the church's Elders, he is struggling to get along with his manager, he is struggling not to lust after his manager's wife and he is struggling to reconcile with his past. His life is a house of cards and a tornado is fast approaching. 
So caught up is he in his own trouble that he doesn't notice that of others. His wife Rose-of-Sharon is growing more and more depressed, their son Rusty is being swept away in a current of hormones and his difficulties finding his feet as a teenager is being interpreted as lack of good behaviour. Trish, the most recent wife, is finding it hard to adjust to life as a fourth wife and having to share her husband with other women. The tension builds and builds around the hapless Golden who entirely fails to notice anything but his own troubles. 

It is a stunning book. I read and read and ready and couldn't stop - I was entirely caught up in the lives of the people in this polygamist family. Trish really struck a chord with me as she beat her doubts and emotions into submission to give herself room to live up to expectations.

The way that Udall portrays the polygamist lifestyle somewhat underplays the difficulties and frustrations that it holds and it does come across as slightly more idyllic than I imagine it really is. This is forgivable though because it is necessary to tell the story. It is a love story but it is not about falling in love, it is not about loving because of - it is about loving despite!
It is a about the love not between a man and a woman but the love that binds a family together even though they don't necessarily agree. And as such it is beautiful and enjoyable. As such it also has a strong message: that the love portrayed in countless romantic movies and book is not the only form of love and that we can be happy even though our lives do not conform to the general idea about the perfect life. 

Read it if: You're not afraid to confront your own prejudices. You want to challenge your own perceptions of what the right way of living is. 

Review: "The Chosen One" - Chosen without a choice

Do you know that feeling of reading a YA book and wishing that you had read it when you were actually a young adult (and not like me, nearing 30)? I had that feeling yesterday when I put down "The Chosen One" by Carol Lynch Williams. It is definitely a YA book that would have been a favourite if I had read it when I was 13 or 14 (except that it wasn't published then).

Kyra is a 13-year-old girl who is part of the sect The Chosen Ones. They are a polygamous sect living in the desert somewhere in the USA, secluded from the surrounding world and ruled by self-proclaimd prophet. Kyra is living with her family - her father, her several mothers and many siblings - and being quite happy until the day her 60-something uncle Hyrum proclaims that he has chosen her. He is one of the powerful men in the sect and though Kyra's father has tried to intervene, there is nothing to be done. Kyra, no more than a child, will marry a man who could be her grandfather and who already has wives.
Kyra, however, is a resourceful young lady with a few secrets. She is falling in love with her friend Joshua who wants to choose her and together they read - something which is forbidden. This is her safe space but as the marriage with Hyrum draws closer, Kyra has to decide if she will follow the prophet's will or try to break free. It is a choice that will not only affect her but also her family.

What I love about this book, is Kyra's voice. As the pages go by she becomes more and more desperate and the better she (and the reader) get to know Hyrum, the more she realizes that she can never be his wife. This was an easy-read for me, short and well-written but definitely a tween/teen book. But it was also very emotional because Kyra is so alive as a character. I wanted to shelter her and give her a new and better life, away from violence and men that force women and children to adhere to ridiculous rules. It reminded me of "The 19th Wife" by David Ebershoff which deals with very much the same subject but in adult fiction and they are great to read together as a package because they describe a way of life that is so difficult to understand for an outsider.
If you need a resent for a 12-14 year old girl who likes reading, I definitely recommend going for "The Chosen One".

For other reviews of "The Chosen One" visit:
My Friend Amy's Blog: http://www.myfriendamysblog.com/2009/05/review-chosen-one-by-carol-lynch.html'

I Was A Teenage Book Geek: http://www.iwasateenagebookgeek.blogspot.com/2010/07/review-chosen-one-carol-lynch-williams.html

S. Krishna's Books: http://www.skrishnasbooks.com/2009/06/chosen-one-carol-lynch-williams.html